Mindy’s Place

Having not grown up in a “Christian” family I often wonder what it’s like and how Jer and I can make sure that our children’s faith is real and not just learned behavior or succumbing to external expectations.  I look forward to reading this book and found this blog from one of our pastors encouraging.  Grace, Min

The Dynamics of Growing Up Christian at The Family Room
Published by Brian Chesemore January 16th, 2007 in Uncategorized

We live in a local church culture defined by grace, shaped by the gospel. But as a parent I need to remember that my rich experience of grace and the blessings found in Covenant Life don’t guarantee an effortless ride for my sons into conversion or holiness.

Our very own Karl Graustein has written an excellent book, Growing Up Christian. In his book he addresses the danger of false assurance. As parents must be aware of this danger and skillfully lead our children by God’s word. We asked him share his needed perspective on the Family Room blog:

Have you known anyone who seemed to be a Christian throughout his teenage years, but when he went off to college dropped his faith and stopped following God? Have you known anyone who actively participated in youth meetings and church missions trips, but after high school no longer pursued God or the things of God?

Sadly, I know too many people like this, and you can probably quickly list a few names yourself. Growing up around Christians doesn’t make anyone a Christian. Nor do we inherit our Christianity from our parents. We need a faith and a walk of our own. We need to personally know and respond to the gospel message. We need to personally respond to the call of our Lord on our lives. And we need to personally live for Christ.

Growing up in a Christian home is a wonderful privilege. Church kids have been given so much: godly parents, training in the Word of God, friends from Christian homes, support from a Christian church community, and most importantly an opportunity to know God at a young age. Throughout our lives, we are repeatedly taught about the love of God, his plan of salvation, ways to recognize and resist sin, and living for the glory of God.

Not only are church kids given much, we are also protected from much. Our God-fearing and loving parents wisely limit our entertainment options—television, music, movies, books, and magazines. They carefully monitor our friendships and our exposure to the message of the world. We learn about the lies of secular values and other religions. We are trained to evaluate all of life according to the standards of Scripture.

Daily, I benefit from years of being taught the truths of Scripture and from countless hours of reading the Word. My parents have provided for me a clear example of living all of life for the glory of God, maintaining a strong marriage, and raising children. Because of faithful training by my parents, teachers, and church leaders, I have not had to break many bad habits and regret years of godless living. It truly is a great blessing to be a church kid.

Yet, church kids do face some unique challenges. Though surrounded by the things of God, we can still be drawn to sin and live double lives; we can easily assume we are saved even if we are not; or we may be driven by a desire to be popular more than a desire to live according to biblical values. While it is a great blessing to grow up in a Christian environment, if we are not careful we can make some dangerous assumptions about ourselves, which have serious consequences.

I know first hand what it is like to simply copy our parents’ beliefs and convictions. I know how difficult it can be to live according to the standards of the Bible and our parents. I know what it is like to obey to avoid punishment instead of truly wanting to please God or my parents. I have had friends who appeared to be Christians in high school, but later walked away from their faith. I’ve known individuals who have partied on Saturday night and put on their Sunday best for church the next morning. I have observed students act one way when an adult is present and completely different when they think no one is watching. I have watched students be attracted to the values and practices of the world around them and believe the lies the world promotes. I have had students lie to me in an attempt to avoid discipline.

Let me end by quoting J.C. Ryle from in his book Holiness. He reminds us of the privilege of having religious parents and warns us about the dangers we face.

“I ask the children of religious parents to mark well what I am saying. It is the highest privilege to be the child of a godly father and mother, and to be brought up in the midst of many prayers. It is a blessed thing indeed to be taught the gospel from our earliest infancy, and to hear of sin, and Jesus, and the Holy Spirit, and holiness, and heaven, from the first moment we can remember anything. But, oh, take heed that you do not remain barren and unfruitful in the sunshine of all these privileges: beware lest your heart remains hard, impenitent, and worldly, notwithstanding the many advantages you enjoy. You cannot enter the kingdom of God on the credit of your parents’ religion. You must eat the bread of life for yourself, and have the witness of the Spirit in your own heart. You must have repentance of your own, faith of your own, and sanctification of your own.”

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